(I am resuming this blog on ministry mentoring after a couple of years. In the meantime I have reworked my original definition as part of the process in writing my doctoral thesis on the subject and present it here. I will be posting excerpts here from my forthcoming book on the subject from time to time and welcome any comments and suggestions.)
Christian ministry mentoring is a formational learning activity in the context of a relationship built on mutual trust by which the mentor guides the spiritual growth and ministry development of the mentee in cooperation with the Holy Spirit along critical growth pathways towards Christian maturity, ministry wisdom and discernment for effective ministry engagement.
Let us look at the different concepts within this definition in more detail.
A Formational Learning Activity (Among Others)
There are any number of formational learning activities that are used to facilitate the development of adult learners. Descriptions and attempts to define these different learning activities sometimes overlap. This can lead to a lack of clarity. In particular, mentoring is sometimes confused with coaching so it will be helpful differentiate between the two. Coaching tends to be more focussed on particular behaviours or skills whereas “mentoring often addresses or focuses on issues that are broader than those covered in the typical coaching relationship” (Allen, Finkelstein, and Poteet 2009, 3). Having said that, coaching conversations are among the tools that a mentor frequently uses when engaging the mentee. It is also possible that some coaching engagements become very much like mentoring relationships as they expand into other areas of life and vocation of the person being coached or mentored. Another difference is that a formal coaching arrangement often involves financial payment for coaching sessions. Mentoring arrangements tend to be volunteer arrangements or are included in job descriptions in organizational settings.
Other formational learning activities such as teaching, training, counselling and consulting are included as needed at various times in the mentoring engagement but by themselves are not the same as mentoring. To come at it from the opposite perspective, we can also say that teachers, counsellors and consultants from time to time move beyond their primary activities and become mentors to the people they engage.
When it comes to spiritual character development or spiritual formation, Christian ministry mentoring also includes what is often described as “discipleship.” Particularly in the early stages such a mentoring relationship will seem like basic discipleship in that many of the same issues of spiritual development are addressed. In popular understanding, discipleship often refers to the spiritual formation of a newly converted person until they mature. However, ministry mentoring from the outset pays attention to leadership development and ministry competencies in a way that discipleship may not necessarily address. Another formational learning activity in the field of spiritual formation is spiritual direction. In this relationship, a spiritual director helps an individual discern the movements of the Holy Spirit in his or her life. This has sometimes been called spiritual mentoring and is usually also a part of what happens in a ministry mentoring relationship.
In the day-to-day practice of mentoring as a formational learning activity, it is not usually necessary to distinguish between these different activities. One kind of mentoring activity flows seamlessly into another according to the need of the situation. However being aware of these different activities enables the mentor to improve his or her mentoring skills in the various kinds of mentoring activities. The various formational learning activities relating to mentoring are explained in more detail in chapter three.
A Relationship Built on Mutual Trust
A mentoring relationship requires that both the mentor and the mentee are aware of the relationship even if they do not specifically call it a mentoring relationship. Sometimes people have named authors and historical people them as their mentors. These are not real mentorships since there is no relationship. I would consider these perceived connections as an aspect of self-directed learning which are a part of a person’s overall development journey. But a mentoring relationship as I define it in this book is reciprocal in that there is ongoing interaction between the mentor and the mentee. In this relationship the mentor is willing to mentor the mentee and the mentee wants to be mentored by the particular mentor. There is an agreement of some kind as to whether this relationship is formal or informal. They trust one another at least in the areas of mentoring focus and usually in other areas of life and work as well. There is a clear understanding of confidences that need to be kept in relation to sensitive matters. It usually also involves sharing with one another in various matters of life experience. This relationship is in fact a kind of friendship that has the potential to deepen as time passes. Some of these aspects of the mentoring relationship are explained in chapter three and four.
The Mentor Guides the Development of the Mentee
In a mentoring relationship, the mentee takes ownership of his or her own learning and development. The mentor as the more knowledgeable person primarily guides the learning experience. At the beginning of the relationship, the mentor may need to provide a little more direction with regard to the areas of focus. But as the relationship develops and the mentee matures, the mentee is in a better position to determine his or her learning needs. This concept is developed further in chapter five.
Cooperation with the Holy Spirit
The mentor does not engage in mentoring without recognizing that he or she is simply a human instrument cooperating with the work of the Holy Spirit in the life of the mentee. The mentor is guiding the mentee while continually asking the question: What is God doing in the life of the mentee and how am I to facilitate that? The mentor also pays attention to the broader concerns of the kingdom of God in the ministry context of the mentee. Chapters five and six speak to this in more detail while chapter two provides the theological rationale.
Critical Growth Pathways
Each mentee has unique learning needs based on their own journey, learning style and current ministry context. The mentor and mentee need to establish what the critical growth pathways might be. The mentee as the driver of this relationship will likely have some felt learning needs that relate to the immediate ministry context. The mentor may then assist the mentee to map out the critical growth pathways that lead towards the learning that needs to occur. The mentor may from time to time point out areas of concern for learning and development that the mentee may not be aware of. Chapter six suggests some models and approaches relating to these growth pathways.
The Distinctive Objectives of Ministry Mentoring
In a mentoring relationship all areas are potentially open for discussion—life issues as well as ministry matters. Of particular interest might be how the mentee work towards rightly relating to all of life and ministry in a healthy and functional way.
Christian ministry mentoring relates primarily to development of Christian ministry leaders. Ministers are those who are involved in or are aspiring to be active in various leadership roles in church or parachurch ministries including those having apostolic, prophetic, evangelistic, pastoral and teaching ministries as well as those involved in administration and serving (Eph. 4:11; Rom. 12:6-8)
Ministry mentoring focuses on the development of Christian character in the minister and seeks a high standard of Christian maturity (Jas 3:1). It is concerned with ministry and leadership skills and competencies as required by the particular role of the Christian minister who is being mentored. The mentor engages the mentee with regard to the particular ministry calling. This includes helping the mentee navigate her ministry journey towards appropriate placement in ministry according to her natural ability, acquired skills, and spiritual gifts.